These questions can help children get better at naming feelings, understanding what caused them, noticing what they need, solving problems, and understanding other people. You do not need to ask all of them at once. Pick one or two during car rides, bedtime, meals, or after school.
Understanding Their Feelings
What feeling showed up the most today?
What made you happiest today?
Did anything make you feel sad?
What annoyed you today?
Did anything make you nervous or worried?
Was there a moment when you felt really excited?
Did you feel left out at any point today?
When did you feel most comfortable today?
Was there a moment when you felt embarrassed?
Did you have two different feelings about something today?
Learning What Is Behind the Feeling
What happened right before you started feeling that way?
What were you thinking when that happened?
What do you think made that situation so upsetting?
Was the problem what happened or what you thought it meant?
Did anything small turn into a bigger problem today?
Was there something you expected to happen that did not happen?
What bothered you most about what happened?
Did something remind you of another experience?
What did you wish had happened instead?
Does that feeling make sense when you think about what happened?
Understanding Their Needs
What did you need when you were upset?
Did you want help, space, comfort, or someone to listen?
Was there something you needed but did not know how to ask for?
What could someone have done that would have helped?
What can you do next time when you need something?
Did you need a break at any point today?
Was there a moment when you wished you had spoken up?
Is there something you want me to understand about today?
What would make tomorrow feel easier?
Is there anything you want help with right now?
Building Problem-Solving Skills
What was the hardest part of your day?
What did you do when something went wrong?
Did what you tried help?
What could you try differently next time?
What part of the situation could you control?
What part could you not control?
If the same thing happened tomorrow, what would you do?
Who could you ask for help?
What choice are you proud of making today?
Did you solve any problem today that felt difficult at first?
Building Empathy and Social Awareness
How do you think someone else felt today?
Did you notice anyone who seemed upset or lonely?
Did someone do something kind for you?
Did you do something kind for someone else?
Was there a disagreement where both people had a point?
Did you misunderstand anyone today?
Is there something you wish you had said differently?
Did someone cross one of your boundaries today?
Did you respect someone else's boundary even when you did not like it?
What is one thing you understand better about yourself after today?
